Triggers

Triggers are things or words someone says that we encounter that makes us very uncomfortable and possibly allows us to indulge in our eating disorder.  These things can be something as simple as a number, the outfit someone wears, a situation and yes even a smell.  We become so super sensitive to the item/words/smells/situations/places that we tend to close up mentally.   Triggers can sometimes even cause somatic symptoms.  One of my own triggers is so severe that I instantly become nauseated.  

So what can we do when we find ourselves becoming triggered?  This is when we need to open our toolbox and use some of the tools we have.  Breathe, use distraction,  use a CBT or a DBT technique if you are familiar with them just to name a few.  

Make a list of things/words/smells/situations/places that you know are triggers to you.  Then work with your professional support team to help you to figure out what tools in your toolbox might work for each thing that you know is triggering.  This is called a ‘Cope Ahead Plan’.  You are pre-planning ahead of time so you have options for when you may be triggered.  Practice these tools BEFORE you need to use them.  By practicing our tools when we are calm, they are more likely to come to mind much more quickly when we need them.

If we do get triggered by someone we need to ask ourselves a question…Was the person aware that their actions/words are triggering to us?  If the answer to this question is yes, we have to make the decision as to whether we want this person in our lives.  We can always terminate the conversation; though for us it may be hard to do since most of us are not able to stand up for ourselves in the beginning of our recovery journey.  To do something like this takes practice.  However,  we NEED to realize that most people have no clue what may or may not trigger us or even what our individual triggers are.  Becoming upset is normal and natural, but it is up to us to let the person know that their words are making us uncomfortable in a private setting.  There is never a need to humiliate someone because we are triggered.

If the trigger is a situation, we can always remove ourselves from it.  When I go out with others I always drive myself.  This way I do not have to rely on someone who may not be ready to leave to stop and take me home.  I can excuse myself (if needed make up an excuse, such as I have a bad headache) and just go home.  Once I have removed myself I can reach out to someone within my support team and verbalize my emotions.

If the trigger is a place we can:

  • avoid going there
  • Go to the place for very small amounts of time, it may only be 1 minute the first time.  That’s okay!  Increasing the amount of time by small amounts each time.  This technique is a form on prolonged exposure.  
  • if you have to go to that place you could take a trusted person who may or may not be in your support circle.  Be honest with them so they know what to expect.  If possible let them know how they can help you.  Remember, people can’t help us if they aren’t aware of what is going on with us.   
  • Another option could be that you limit your exposure to that place if at possible.  Again, drive yourself so you can leave if needed.

If the trigger is a particular smell, remove yourself from the area in order to not smell it any longer.

Anytime we are triggered we can use our breathing techniques we have learned to calm ourself, our mind and our body.  DO NOT beat yourself up;  look at what you can do the next time you encounter the trigger.   Each time we handle any trigger we might have, it lets our brain know you are a strong person and you will not allow it to control you.  

FINAL THOUGHTS:

I know and believe that those of us who suffer from an ED of any type can beat it.  It is hard work and at times feels impossible; but I am sure it is a goal that is obtainable to all of you out there.

KEEP YOUR CHIN UP!  Take baby steps towards your recovery, put one foot in front of the other and know, with a capital K, you CAN do it.  Even if you can’t see it now, the world needs you!

Affirmations

Affirmations can be a great tool in our toolbox when fighting this disease of eating disorders.  They can be used to motivate us, remind us that we are worth the struggle and of our successes, help us to stay the course, reaffirm our need for resilience and persistence and remind us that we ‘got this’.   We can also use affirmations at any time no matter where we are or who we are with.  We can silently speak our selected affirmations in our head as many times as we need to in order to calm ourselves down.  If we are alone we can even say them out loud to ourselves.  I have even spoken them to my dogs at times when I am really struggling.  They listened and wagged their tails to let me know they heard me, though I doubt they actually understood.  But that was okay because my mind/brain heard them.  Affirmations ought to be short and easy to remember so you can use it whenever you need to.  That is the joy of using affirmations.

Affirmations work because they help reshape your thought patterns, reinforce positive beliefs, and reduce negative self-talk.  For affirmations to be most effective, they should be specific, believable, and emotionally meaningful to you. Repeating them with intention and visualization can further enhance their impact.  

The brain can rewire itself based on repeated thoughts and experiences. When you consistently use affirmations, you strengthen neural pathways associated with positive thinking and self-belief.  The brain filters information based on what you focus on. If you repeatedly affirm something (e.g., “I am confident”), your brain starts noticing opportunities and evidence that support this belief.  Affirmations counteract negative self-talk and help reframe limiting beliefs. Over time, they can shift your internal dialogue from self-doubt to self-empowerment.  Positive affirmations can put you in a constructive mindset, boosting motivation, resilience, and self-esteem.  When you believe in your affirmations, you’re more likely to take actions that align with them, reinforcing the desired outcome.

If you are unable at this time to make your own affirmations you can google affirmations and more affirmations that you can remember will show up.  Pick the ones that fit your situation you are struggling with to use.  Since affirmations are one of the easiest tools to use that we can put in our toolbox, give them a try.  It can only help you combat the negativity that tags along with our ED.

Here are some examples of affirmations you may want to try: “I am enough,” “I am valuable,” “I deserve happiness”, ”I am resilient,” “I am powerful,” “I can overcome anything”, “I am beautiful inside and out,” “I love and accept myself,” “I radiate positive energy”, “I am capable,” “I believe in myself,” “I am a leader”, “I am always learning and evolving,” “I embrace challenges,” “I am proud of my progress”.

FINAL THOUGHTS:

I know and believe that those of us who suffer from an ED of any type can beat it.  It is hard work and at times feels impossible; but I am sure it is a goal that is obtainable to all of you out there.

KEEP YOUR CHIN UP!  Take baby steps towards your recovery, put one foot in front of the other and know, with a capital K, you CAN do it.  Even if you can’t see it now, the world needs you!

Vision Boards

I have created over 120 vision boards in the past 2 1/2 years.  These have served to remind myself in the many areas I struggle with that I can handle whatever it is. At times I have even printed them out and put them where I can easily see them.  A visual reminder works wonders for me.  I have put out a handful of them on here for you, with more to come.  Feel free to print any of them out if you find they are helpful to you.  Or you can simply use them for ideas on how to make your own vision boards using whatever medium you choose, whether it is drawing, painting, scrapbooking or cut and paste using the internet.   Sometimes I will even put the lyrics to a song that speaks to me and encourages me to keep on going. At times my vision board consist of only pictures that speak to me on the topic I need to express.  Your options are limitless.

FINAL THOUGHTS:

I know and believe that those of us who suffer from an ED of any type can beat it.  It is hard work and at times feels impossible; but I am sure it is a goal that is obtainable to all of you out there.

KEEP YOUR CHIN UP!  Take baby steps towards your recovery, put one foot in front of the other and know, with a capital K, you CAN do it.  Even if you can’t see it now, the world needs you!

Journaling

Journaling is a tried and true method to help us get out and deal with all of the negative emotions that fly through our minds.  It is also a great way to keep track of our progress.   When we write out our thoughts, both negative and positive ones, it allows for more consideration, greater clarity with complex ideas.  It also helps our brains to process and believe our thoughts even more than if we just verbalize them.  When we just speak our thoughts it is usually more spontaneous and we are less careful of the words we use and even less aware of how our brain processes them.

Journaling encourages a much more thorough way to communicate our thoughts, feelings and emotions making it easier to follow a logical progression.   The act of physically writing down your thoughts can stimulate deeper cognitive processing and help you gain a better understanding of your own ideas.  It also allows you to bring the journal to any meetings you have with your professional support team.  This allows them to know what you were really thinking and feeling at the time.  As we know, we usually have so much to say when we meet with our support team that it is easy to forget something important as well as to no longer feel the feelings and emotions to the depth we felt them at the time of our journaling.

Journaling  does not always have to be in the form of writing out our thoughts.  For some of us, this can be too painful or even allow us to stay focused on our pain.  There are other ways we can express our thoughts such as drawing, vision boards, painting or any combination of the various types of journaling.

Vision boards can be created with any numbers of apps that allow creativity.  This is my preferred method.  It allows me to put together memes, quotes, songs and pictures that express my thoughts at the time.  They are also much easier for me to give to my psychologist and quicker for her to get the idea of what I was feeling at a glance.  The app I use is Zinnia.  This app is not free; but the cost is not all that much and is not prohibitive for me. Most apps you will find for this type of journaling will also allow you to use it for straight journaling if that is your preference.

Drawing or painting out your thoughts can prove to be a very beneficial way to express yourself.  I can’t draw, even stick people, so I chose not to use this method.  But if you are a person who can draw or paint and enjoys doing so, then by all means, express yourself this way.  There is some proof that drawing or painting is as therapeutic as actually journaling.  There are apps and books out there to help you if you choose this method though you don’t have to use them if you feel you don’t need them.  Some mental health professionals are even trained in this method.  You might even think about seeing if you can find a class that utilizes this method, if you are in place to be able to financially afford it.   Not areas will have classes for this though, so you may want to google this if you are interested in a class.

Remember your journaling can be just for you to express yourself if that is what you chose.  Most apps have a feature where you can set up, if you want, to put a password needed to access it.  This ensures no one can access your deepest and inner most thoughts without your permission.  If you are in any type of professional help you might want to check with them.  They may have ideas as to what type of journaling, if any, that you might want to try.

Happy journaling!

FINAL THOUGHTS:

I know and believe that those of us who suffer from an ED of any type can beat it.  It is hard work and at times feels impossible; but I am sure it is a goal that is obtainable to all of you out there.

KEEP YOUR CHIN UP!  Take baby steps towards your recovery, put one foot in front of the other and know, with a capital K, you CAN do it.  Even if you can’t see it now, the world needs you

A Higher Power

For those of us who suffer from an ED, our eating disorder became our ‘higher power’ whether we wanted it to or not.  This disease because the strongest thing in our lives, dictating our every thought, feeling, emotion, and action.  We looked it to “change our life”, to offer us security, to guide us.  It dictated how we acted and reacted to all things that impacted us, situations and our lives.  All of the decisions we made were based on what the ED told us was the best for us.  Our eating disorder became the ‘end all – be all’ and the most important thing we turned to in times of stress, joy, sadness, happiness and yes even excitement.  I am here to tell you that ED lies!

Our higher power never causes us to act in a manner that is so contrary to our real value system.  Nor will it cause us to become someone that we do not recognize and have no idea ‘who we are‘.  A true higher power will never encourage us to act in such unhealthy ways.  It would never encourage us to isolate ourselves.  It would never help us to continue on our journey of self-hatred.  No higher power wants us to fail.  ED lies!

A higher power helps to encourage us to be the best we can be; to become someone that we ourselves can be proud of.  It can help calm us in moments of distress and uncertainty.  It allows us reach for inner peace.  It can increase (NOT DECREASE) our faith and belief in ourselves.  It should be someone/something that we can reach for when we are at our wit’s end and to keep moving forward.  A higher power should want us to survive and thrive.

Some people call their higher power God.  Others call it the universe or Mother Nature.  Regardless what name you put on your higher power, it is a massive power that guides us in our journey of recovery.   I cannot tell you what or who your higher power should be; that is a very personal choice.  But I am here to tell you that it can be one of the most powerful tools in your tool box.  Talk to it; tell it your troubles, fears, anxieties and negative emotions.  Then listen in the quietness.  Sometimes the answers to what you are experiencing will come to you quickly.  Other times you will just have to be quiet and trust that your higher power will send you the answers that will come to you in time.  At times the answers will be in a form you are not expecting such as a person who says the exact thing at the exact right time.  Or maybe an ah-ha moment you have yourself.  Your higher power will always give you what you NEED; not necessarily what you WANT.  Converse with it and be patient.

FINAL THOUGHTS:

I know and believe that those of us who suffer from an ED of any type can beat it.  It is hard work and at times feels impossible; but I am sure it is a goal that is obtainable to all of you out there.

KEEP YOUR CHIN UP!  Take baby steps towards your recovery, put one foot in front of the other and know, with a capital K, you CAN do it.  Even if you can’t see it now, the world needs you.